Terrible Cliches Exist For a Reason

Its hot, and I need to shower, and thats pretty much how I feel on the inside too - in need of cleansing.

I slept 15 hours last night. I had to. I had to get away from my thoughts. The things that we require emotionally as human beings are not always, or dare I venture to say, NEVER what we first anticipate needing. Sometimes they are the exact opposite of what we want. Sometimes the right thing to do is the thing that scares the hell out of you. Sometimes these questions plague you until you cannot do anything but think about them. Sometimes you can't sleep, or eat, or even leave the house. So here I am, leg sticking to the leg of the desk in my bedroom, in my apartment, in Arizona, lost in a world of thought.

What the fuck is it in me that has such twisted requirements and why? Is it really my ego - and does it need these things to compensate for a lack of self confidence?  

Look at the relationships people choose to get themselves into. Everyone knows somebody, at least ONE person, who gets into one bad relationship after another after an even worse one. The whole while this person doesn't seem to realize that instead of addressing the issues they obviously have with themselves, they create more issues. I suppose these people have an insane fear of being alone because they don't know how to face themselves. Sounds terribly cliche, I know, but there's a reason for terrible cliches.

In the meantime I still need to clean my apartment. Its probably not going to happen today.